Well, we did it! We made it through the week, and don’t think I don’t have another spectacular message via the magic of online dating for you!
So, let’s not waste any more time!!
As you may have gathered from my previous posts, I am severely annoyed by people who can’t spell, or can’t be bothered to spell words correctly. “Ur“… really?!
Oh, Jose! You poor bastard! I started criticizing you far too early!! I was going to go on for a bit about you being too lazy to spell out “you’re“, but obviously you’re just an idiot! For Christ sakes, you spelled the name of your nationality wrong!! And when you say you’re European, like Portuguese, does that mean you are Portuguese or just something like that? I’m leaning towards the later considering you couldn’t even spell it.
I’m just going to disregard the rest of the spelling errors, or else we would be here all damn day.
Now, Holy Hell!! What’s that you say?! You work with hot asphalt?! I was just going to delete your message, but now that I know that you handle hot, stinking pavement materials I have to reply RIGHT NOW!!! That’s right guys, nothing gets the ladies going like hearing you work with hot “ashphalt” …Nope. Can’t do it! Fuck, dude! You spelled asphalt wrong too!! How can you work with a substance that is like a 1000° when you can’t even spell it?! HOW!!! In fact, how you haven’t horribly burned yourself, Jose is beyond me! Though, I’m making a big assumption there…
And, oh boy! It’s almost lay-off time of the year, and Jose just can’t wait to sit around like a lump until the spring! Awesome…! That lack of motivation is super sexy!
…and the icing on the cake is the ‘lol‘ as punctuation.
Online dating makes my heart hurt.